Saturday, April 30, 2005
its been 3 wks and i'm proud of myself, i'm still standing strong. though i felt mentally, physical drained but i had not fallen yet. temper was short towards my parent and kt @ times.. i'm so sorry.
will get recharge tmr, yeah! tangkak here i come..
sLeep zZzzz @ 00:30
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Friday, April 29, 2005
recieve a forwarded email from xL, the content as below:
There are 13 items hidden in this room in order to let you get out of this room. There are less than 4000 people in the world who can escape this house. So have a try.
http://flash.qbol.net/pl;p/youxi/images/04042203.swf
0-6 items, your IQ is very low, total idiot
6-8 items, Low IQ, u r an idiot
9-10 items, u r normal
11-12 items, your IQ is high, above the average.
13 items found and get out of the room, there are less than 4000 people in the world can do it.
i managed to found 12 items, really wonder if there's 13 items. the music box is quite useless for our entertainment only? if anyone manage to find the 13th item, pls inform me so i shall cont to hunt for the item.
sLeep zZzzz @ 10:14
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Thursday, April 28, 2005
ultimate sian mode: ON
requirement 1:
paycheck day for other staffs but where's mine? havent had a look @ my contract since the 1st day of work 3 wks ago. going to be cow for the next mth, eating grass. - if grass is edible, that will be great -
some girls chatting on cheque deposit thingy, one manager came alongmanager: so yx have u gotten ur cheque?
zZz: no, havent sign the contract.
manager: *shock + stun expression* i ready pass the document to .....
requirment 2:
felt like an ultimate programming ediot now, picking up the languages, syntax all over again coz i had forgotten every single bit of info i had learnt yrs ago and asking super ediotic qns to solve my error. plus many new stuffs to know [soap, pear, smarty or smarti or smartie..] i foresee some errors coming up real soon that goes something like, error detected "not enough brainspace"
yesterday: i still like web developing after all.
today: i felt like a complete programming ediot.
tomorrow: unknown syntax error.
sLeep zZzzz @ 17:38
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Tuesday, April 26, 2005
i'm seriously deprived of sleep. the last time i'm being deprive was like 5 years ago when i was a poly yr 2 kid..
practically out for work like 16hrs per day, multi-tasking between my new job and helping dad. i need 36hrs per day manz ........... =(
sLeep zZzzz @ 00:11
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Friday, April 15, 2005
The zth time of mahjong session this year and i should stop it man!!
i am used to be the rare guest on special occassion and it seems like i had became a regular mahjong kakis this yr omg!!
i wasnt those experts or some super lucky girl that i can maintain @ zero dollar [no win no lose] status.. or positive dollar status though this yr my luck is slightly better than the past yrs.
last weekend was the longest session for 2 rounds.. 2nd Rd lasted from 0200+ - 0600++.. i should be happy for our endurance man!! and it's the shoikest mahjong sesson that i had!! can complaint/boost to those regular kakis that didnt manage to wait to game 13-Odds before ahhaa!!!!
flipped tiles and saw more than 50% 13-Odd tiles, tough to play but it will really waste many rounds to get my normal small winning game. i'm lucky to draw more 13-Odds tiles and started throwing away super unwanted non-13-Odds tiles. in between sS 'pong' my 'FaCai' away and i have no 'FaCai' man but since already more than ard 50% toward the end of the game, i was praying that the last 'Fa' will not be out so soon and i can snatch sS's 'kang' wahahaaAHahaaa!!!!! *evil grinz* utimate 13-Odds game to me man! snatch ppl's 'kang' hehehehe!
was praying that the last 'FaCai' will not be out so soon and Not, will not be out.. duhz... i can never game 13-Odds! the last 'FaCai' was at the last 7.5 tiles... sad man!!!!
but sS mention that i should be happy that i can actually wait to game 13-Odds coz not much ppl can actually wait to game somemore i waited quite long.. I do agree but still sad leh cant game 13-Odds whahaha!! somemore can snatch ppl 'kang' leh.. whaha! okie i am crap, i am more excited to snatch 'kang' than winning the game ehhee.. *pout*
sLeep zZzzz @ 23:54
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Tuesday, April 12, 2005
did I mention before that I was struggling to accept t.a offer after my 2nd interview? Although they havent gave me the confirmation till last sunday.
1: company was dealing with online security payment stuff and etc which I had no knowledge on. [Online payment, dont play play, later any error I pay myself?!!]
2: sorta knew that J will be my in-charge even before I step into the company and J was the one that gave out stern, arrogant aura which I didnt like.
3: very english-speaking environment which I wondered if I will be able to understand their instruction as I might not be able to understand bombastic wordings.
but on the 1st day of wk,
1: I will not be dealing online payment as yet, coz was assigned to implement some web development system.
2: J wasnt arrogant or stern after all, he was patiently explaining how does ssl works for 2 hrs which will be beneficial to me in term of extra knowledge as I am quite interested in networking. Was quite information overloaded for a newbie but luckily there's written note by him while explaining to me.
3: they actually speak chinese! whahaa or izzit I’m the one that started conversing chinese with them =P and some other biz temp staffs were really funny! which make me felt at ease.
Though I was quite stressed over their biz flow coz it was quite confusing and I mixed up information quite often but give me more time to absorb them =)) I believed I should be able to know the flow by next wk =)))
sLeep zZzzz @ 22:13
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Monday, April 11, 2005
t.a should had notified me on the 2nd April if i am selected for the job vacancy but after waiting for 5 working days, I thought "haiz, should be gone again" and I finally sent out my 1st job application [haha, found it on jobdb, posted in march! most probably the job had been taken] without so-called friends recommendation.
But yesterday, biz manager called and asked if I am able to start work today and I think its kinda rush and request to start work tomorrow instead.
Thus, today is my last day @ h.s.a
My youth was spent in h.s.a for 3.5 yrs. The first IT job right after I graduated. Really thanx von to intro me the job and it was really nice working with a friend in the same company. It is consider long for a temporary position and lotsa ppl had nagged me to change job esp my dad. I knew that he is concern abt my future but i am too lazy to find a new job, dread to go for interviews and I thought should just rot my time with von in the company.
But during the 3.5 yrs, I felt lost at times. thanx to my greatest enemy - laziness.
Ard 3 yrs ago, while the guys were serving our country with pathetic allowance, minimum job prospect coz not every guy wanna signon. I didnt fell under the lowest pay, minimum job prospect category with them as compared to the ladies.
But after 2.5 yrs service with the govt, they had came out to find a better job prospect than me. I eventually fell under the lowest pay, lousiest job prospect category.
Blame it on my laziness. I felt lost.
Ard 2.5 yrs ago, von and xL had asked me to apply for distance learning degree course on the last day of registration with them. I'm too lazy to rush home to get documents for the application and I preferred oversea studies that time coz I would really like to experience something different. Different cultures, different environment, different sceneries. The Differences.
But after 2 yrs of studies, they had become degree holder. I am still a pathetic diploma holder & my bank acct is too miserable to take up even 1 semester course works.
Blame it on my laziness. I felt lost again, losing my direction in attaining a degree cert oversea.
Ard 1 yr plus ago, h.s.a had employed someone to help them cut cost and temp staffs were the 1st to face the chopping broad but von and I had survived till this year.
Really thanx to albert, a great supervisor with no air, happy-go-lucky person, friendly and lots more that only ppl that had worked with him before will knew. He had tried means and ways to help us to extend our stay @ h.s.a and I greatly appreciated that, really.. I was really lucky to have someone like him for my 1st IT job.
But after 1 yr, my projects were all @ maintenance stages and the senior management guy had tried to stop all enhancements though some other guys from other dept will really like to have new systems or enhancement.
I felt quite lost again in the recent month after some job interviews. I really need to find job fast else I will be jobless soon and I wouldnt want my family to worry on my personal life coz I believed I should be responsible to the decisions that I had made. Thus I believed I will not notify them abt the jobless status [if that really happened] and it will be tough to pass the mini dough to my mum each mth.
There's a chinese term, "dont seek advice from senior, and you will get disadvantages sooner or later.. " Yes, when the time arrived, I truly understood my dad concern for me working as temporary staff for such a long time.
Interviewer might wonder why are you working as a temp for so long, are you not capable to be converted into perm staff? Although is due to the fact that the company dont have any to offer but the interviewer wouldnt know.
Employer will quote your the salary based on your last pay and it seems like 3 yrs of experiences is gone to waste as temp staff coz there’s no increment, no benefits and etc throughout the whole 3.5 yrs.. perm dont usually faced such prob.
Just when I wanna get back on my feet to fight my greatest enemy, t.a had asked me over to work for them. I must consider myself lucky as t.a wanna employ me [due to the fact that they really need ppl to rush out something for them]. Though the salary do not justified to my work experience but I think, it’s better than nothing @ the moment. Cause I might still faced irritating interviewers, or companies that will offer the similar stuff that t.a can offered since I am still in a temp staff status.
The older we get, the more commitments we had and we really need a job to survive.
I felt like a little kid that albert and von had taken care of during these 3.5 yrs and I am really greatful to them whom had sheltered me from thunder and storms.. Now, I am on my own expedition and I had to learn the ropes to survive outside my comfort zone on my own.
I was happy on my last day of work with h.s.a, had a form of emotional relieved because I knew that there's a new job waiting for me tmr instead of a day for me to struggle with job interviews. I was happily thinking of what to treat my colleagues for appreciation in anyways that they had helped, was happily telling them that today was my last day @ h.s.a and will be working @ new place from tomorrow onwards. I was busy tying up the loose ends for my systems, busy packing 4-5 boxes of stuffs home that had slowly accumulating @ a mini corner of h.s.a. for 3.5 yrs.
actually throughout the stay @ h.s.a is a happy, slacking time of my life where we temp do actually had an advantage over politics in the company coz we are just peanuts that the ppl wont come bother us haa! and the friendly [not to mention meanies] colleagues that I had known here.
was thankful to:
kt for coming down to carry the stuff for me
von for asking allan to drive me back
allan for driving me back
tianxiang for the lunch treat
albert for the lunch/dinner treats..
thus, my chapters of life with h.s.a had ended happily =))
sLeep zZzzz @ 22:10
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Saturday, April 09, 2005
felt 80% of : Baz Luhrmann - Everybody's Free (To Wear Sunscreen)..
Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth, oh never mind, you will never understand the power and the beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in twenty years, you will look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now, how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.
Don't worry about the future or worry that knowing that worrying is as affective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind. The kind that blindsides you at 4 PM on some idle Tuesday. Do one thing every day that scares you.
Sing.
Don't be reckless with other peoples' hearts; don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.
Floss.
Don't waste your time on jealously, sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive, forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters; throw away your old bank statements.
Stretch.
Don't feel guilty if you don't know what to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives, some of the most interesting 40-year-olds I know still don't.
Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to knees, you'll miss them when they're gone.
Maybe you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the "Funky Chicken" on your 75th wedding anniversary.
Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's. Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can, don't be afraid of it or what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.
Dance.
Even if you have nowhere to do it but your own living room. Read the directions
even if you don't follow them. Do not read beauty magazines, they will only make you feel ugly.
Chorus
Brother and sister together will make it through. Some day a spirit will take you and guide you there. I know you've been hurting, but I've been waiting to be there for you. And I'll be there just helping you out, whenever I can.
Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They are your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.
Understand that friends come and go. But a precious few, who should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, for as the older you get, the more you need the people you knew when you were young.
Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft.
Travel.
Accept certain alible truths: prices will rise, politicians will philander, you too will get old and when you do, you'll fanaticise that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble and children respected their elders.
Respect your elders. Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund, maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse but you'll never know when either one will run out.
Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're forty, it will look eighty-five. Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of wishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling for more than it's worth. But trust me on the sunscreen.
Chorus
Everybody's Free, oh yeah, to feel good, ohhhhh, to feel good.
-
felt that this lyrics is meaningful when i 1st heard it. the meaning deepen as years gone by when i heard it again recently. but why sunscreen? *ponder*
everyone had their low seasons in life and so do i, but i am getting out of it already.
i am one weird person, lazy by nature but when i am really bored or feeling low morale, i would take a slow walk, slow bus trip to feel time by me by sec by sec in guilty/ serenity. contradicting? but that’s what i felt. Time is something irreversible and would really like to have the ability to turn back the hands of time but that’s not possible.
really envy those little kids, teenagers or even young adults. i don’t have much commitments back then but to study hard, get promoted to next academic year, enjoy long holiday and stuff.
although there were fears of failing exams, repeating course of studies, getting lousy results, projects deadline but thinking back now, i don’t remembered the fears but the fun times with crappy friends in library playing, the joy when friends helped me when i am in need of advice during project deadline and burning midnight oil exchanging reports for individual references over irc instead.
i believed when i looked back @ the low seasons of my current life now in future, i will feel that all theses were just some minor setbacks..
sLeep zZzzz @ 18:48
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read it before and i still find it quite interesting..
Typoglycemia
I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch taem at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is
taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae.
The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a
wlohe. Such a cdonition is arppoiately cllaed Typoglycemia.
got this url from han, which i found it quite funny..
http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/blockedme.php
sLeep zZzzz @ 18:32
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